Alright, here’s the setup from yesterday:
• I haven’t taken a shit for the whole day.
• For lunch, we prepared some spicy Chinese noodles. You know, my girlfriend and I enjoy trying out cooking different things.
• For dinner, we made Indian butter chicken and naan bread.
While my girlfriend, who’s lactose intolerant, was up a thousand times during the night running to the bathroom, I didn’t feel anything all night. But just five minutes ago, while I was doing the dishes, I felt this epic urge hit me.
I forced myself to finish my chore as quickly as possible, but my anus was calling, rumbling, and pulsing, so I finally gave in and ran to the bathroom. And here I am now, in the acidic fumes of the upside-down volcano that is my butt.
the Shy Tird 