Sunday, 6 September 2026 | 6:21 AM

Stag do for a mate. I’ve spent the whole day drinking beer. Would’ve been manageable if I hadn’t been up since 5AM on four hours’ sleep. Now I’ve got a splitting headache and I just can’t sleep. Hang on — there’s something else keeping me awake… I keep farting....

Friday, 4 September 2026 | 8:05 PM

The whole day hoping to shit again. NO MOVEMENTS. I also tried to eat some dried figs. NO MOVEMENTS Oh wait a minute… let me check…. Uh Oh! Some tuuuuuurds! They look like the same figs I ate a few minutes ago. Very...

Friday, 4 September 2026 | 7:29 AM

Difficult to put it into words, but basically I feel a lot more shit inside me than what I’ve just produced. My bowels are lazy, and I wish I slept more. After all it was all about patience. It could be told precisely. Apart from that difficult smell