I always do some chores before taking a shit.

Here’s my basic routine: we wake up at 07:15-ish, I prepare breakfast while my girlfriend does what I care the most in life, a shit – her bowels are healthier then mine apparently – we eat together, I clean the dishes while she gets ready, I set the bed, then she gets out and I have all the house for myself, half a hour of shit session just for me. Then I get out as well.

Today I’m home-working and I’ve decided to do some laundry right before my important session. And that’s what I did! The only problem is, yesterday I didn’t have the best meals ever, so I was kind of unstable, I spent the evening farting at the office…

I thought I was going to die, this morning, since I was making dishes, I started feeling my bowels very much eager to get emptied, but I just pushed it all back inside, I had chores to do!

Then I headed for the washing machine, and you know, you inevitably have to crouch for selecting and throwing the clothes in the machine… that was the moment when I realised I could not do it anymore. I was a champagne bottle just about to pop.

I rushed to the bathroom and….

All’s well that ends well!

I refrain from describing all that came next, let’s say it was very long, and lasted long.