Even if I just single-turd-pooped, I am so proud. I spent the whole day publishing the video of me pooping on the floor and trying to make it viral. It is difficult tho’

When I am lost in creativity I look down at my tirds.

1) do they float?

Yes

2) what shape so they form?

It’s sort of a ‘Y’. Very curly though

3) colour?

Dark brown

I know it’s not about crap, but it’s somehow related.

I’ve been urging to have a pee for I can’t even tell how long.

It’s painful, you know…

Now that I am having it I decided to take the time.

It’s been exactly 2mins 27seconds with no pause.

Much better. Here’s what I needed: a hamburger and some chips and cheese.

Obviously delivered. Frozen up. Bad.

What am I writing?

Nothing worth telling about

If I’ll ever get pregnant I’d experience the difference between giving birth to a child, and extruding tirds. If there are any…

If a tird is too large, my anus stretches.

There are some times I am constipated, That I have to actively intervene with my hands.

I literally pull the turd out of my arse, and I waste it down the toilet.

Feels like using a very special anal plug.

My anus prickles.

Dear fans,

my tird resembles a Salami!

I know I’m not that original every single time I write a post, though running this blog is my passion. I am passionate about something. I care.

Do you? I am talking to those few people I see caring about my crap – I mean, literally!

You really care about this? I love you. I’ve always hoped for some sort-of-fans, and now someone really exists!

Guys, share me, talk about my madness with people. Spread my disease. Let’s beat covid with my crap!

I mean, thank you, supporters! Thank you so much! If I’d ever reach more people it’ll be mostly because of you. You will be rewarded. I will be sending you something. At the moment I made just some stickers. In the future who knows? T-shirt probably. Maybe books…

Guys, I love you.

Sincerely, The Shy Tird

Still trying to get if it’s a tird or just a fart.

Turd count: 7 pieces

Reek: 7/10

Stickiness: 7.5/10

Avg. rating: 6/10

Huuh. Just came back home after a 6-day-new-year-thing-holiday.

Home sweet home

Shit sour shit.

I still can’t cope with the fact we’re in a new year present.

Who cares? My shit is splashing out of my arse like freshly-dug petrol.