Author Archives: theshytird

Monday, 18 May 2020 | 09:56 AM Blobs sprouting from my – let’s make it SFW – hole. I don’t have a garden

Sunday 17 May 2020 | 05:15 PM This shit’s not even worth talking about

Sunday, 17 May 2020 | 11:43 AM Nooooo, that’s so sticky!

Saturday, 16 May 2020 | 11:51 PM After some ice cream and some board game with the family, I got angry, the milky ice cream kicked in. AND I SHAT ON THE BOARD! I WIIIN!

Saturday, 16 May 2020 | 04:15 PM Floating in mid-air still hanging from my arse… Below it the green-ish smelly pond… That’s the shit of the jungle!

Friday, 15 May 2020 | 02:31 PM Scorching arse means firing comets.

Friday, 15 May 2020 | 10:23 AM A pointy tird has just stang me. It was venomous.

Thursday, 14 May 2020 | 05:33 PM Fly high my little fella. I just thrusted the long crap just extruded from my window.

Thursday, 14 May 2020 | 02:56 PM That one is nice and quiet. It’s like my arse has a silencer.

Thursday, 14 May 2020 | 11:28 AM I reckon it’s time for me to start back reporting about my poop sessions. Yesterday I had a poke bowl for lunch, avocado in it was unripe, too watery, raw fish wasn’t that fresh I believe. I had no dinner whatsoever. Now I am having a pretty conventionalContinue reading “Thursday, 14 May 2020 | 11:28 AM”

Wednesday, 13 May 2020 | 11:06 AM This shitty blog is getting out of my hands. I keep pooping and pooping, and slowly I feel my arse gaining power on myself. I’m not the same person anymore…

Tuesday, 12 May 2020 | 11:55 AM My arse has just queefed, which is weird, cause ain’t no vagina. Stuff rumbled out in the meanwhile. Dirty smooth meatballs

Monday, 11 May 2020 | 03:29 PM How many tirds does it take to change a lightbulb? Free answer

Monday, 11 May 2020 | 01:34 AM Fuck it! Too many farts, I should have known it would have happened this

Sunday, 10 May 2020 | 11:17 AM I should start classifying my tirds. Should I do it by date, stink or dimension? Maybe even color 🤔

Saturday, 9 May 2020 | 12:15 PM My deepest dream above all is to have a shit on the moon.

Friday, 8 May 2020 | 04:26 PM Ice cream makes me feel weird. Only one hour after eating some chocolate ice cream, I just reproduced it neatly within my toilet.

Friday, 8 May 2020 | 09:58 AM Singing ‘la la la la’ Tuney shit

Thursday, 7 May 2020 | 04:39 PM My shit entered Phase 2: it now walks.

Wednesday, 6 May 2020 | 11:11 AM I imagine a future where the shy tird becomes a big international enterprise and I will have all the meeting through web chats directly from my toilet 💭

Tuesday, 5 May 2020 | 10:21 AM Consistency. That’s a necessity of this lifetime work

Monday, 4 May 2020 | 11:11 AM I reckon I’ve never posted at 11:11. How odd! Those numbers really look like these 4 tirds I just arse-crafted. One-shaped tirds!

On fire.

Friday, 1 May 2020 | 04:41 PM I could shit so many times in a day! I feel so blessed! 🤩

Friday, 1 May 2020 | 02:06 PM I could definitely fall asleep in here, sitting on this white china, with a tird hanging from my butthole.

Friday, 1 May 2020 | 08:05 AM Anyone wants a smoothie?

Thursday, 30 April 2020 | 02:48 PM Wonderful day for a second shat! I am starting wondering: what will it be of this blog adventure once summer comes and I’ll shit in the water? I can’t take my phone with me!

Thursday, 30 April 2020 | 11:04 AM Today’s a very special day. It is my dad’s birthday! You know, everything I learned sitting here I learned from him. He is the real Shit Master! Not joking. Never skips a day. He goes at least twice a day: once in the morning, once in the night,Continue reading “Thursday, 30 April 2020 | 11:04 AM”

Tuesday, 28 April 2020 | 07:01 AM And the stink is still here

Tuesday, 28 April 2020 | 06:61 AM Insomnia + chilli bean burritos the day before = whatever’s happening right now in my toilet under my bum. A catastrophe.