Author Archives: theshytird

Cute time for a shit at 11:11 on 11/11. But I ain’t got crap to offload ☹️

Eventually shit came. Luckily only once back home 😌

Means nothing for this website, but I feel like sharing this info anyway. I slept terribly, still burping lunch when going to bed. Wide awake at six o’clock already, still burping dinner. I am pretty much looking forward to my crap session. I am going out for a bike exploration, hope it won’t happen then.Continue reading “Tuesday, 10 November 2020 | 06:19 AM”

Something odd is happening inside my belly. Well, odd for most of the people, but for me random cramps are pretty normal. Ouch. Crap episode attached. Little pieces.

Doing crap at my toilet while watching a recorded Skype meeting. That’s Smart-shitting!

Nothing serious, just another painful shat. It may sound dull. It is hurting indeed.😖

As I was expecting I am in great bowels pain. Yesterday I ordered a mussel soup for lunch. I hate loads of bread with it. Now I suffer. I deserve this. But maybe, could be a little bit less, couldn’t it?

The vast majority of my crap-sessions are accompanied by music. Even shit has its own feelings! I just try to indulge ‘em! 🎵💩🎶 Try to imagine my shit dancing in the pool, now!

Descending of a long tird on the promise land pool. All the inhabitants of my toilet are jaw-drop astonished.

If we invented smart-working, I imagine upgrading my shats with smart-shitting.There will be sort of a A-portal-device inside my pants, and one B-portal on top of my toilet. There it is! smart-shitting!It would have been pretty useful even right now, the smell is terrible!

I am suffering through the pains of hell!! I thought quit eating any bread or pizza would have helped me ceasing this freaking disease. Was I write? Was I wrong? Surely (and sourly) I shouldn’t have eaten that enormous burger yesterday at lunch. There was a patty, caramelised onions, grilled cheese and litres of sauces.Continue reading “Wednesday, 4 November 2020 | 09:15 AM”

Lightly relaxed, playing with my phone, laying on the sofa. BOOOOOOMMM. A bomb just exploded in my belly, tangling my bowels. Why do I have to suffer this much? God, why??? God is full of shit.

Eating hamburger at lunch is not a sustainable choice. Either for the planet and for my bowels. Third shit for today!!

Mini turds! Just 2. One-inch long

That’s not the place for lament, yet pooping and sharing was more exciting when I was with my girlfriend, she was one of my greatest supporters. What hurts most is she still is one of my greatest supporters, but she cannot stay with me. It hurts. My shit ist duller. But I’ll keep posting. SheContinue reading “Tuesday, 3 November 2020 | 09:32 AM”

Djckcjensksicirjricosmajwifjfofj This was the way of describing my morning shat.

This one’s utter evil. It is really difficult to express the feeling of having kind of muscular wrestler hands stretching my bowels as strongly as they can. Ouch. IT HUUURTS!

Sometimes I just feel like a toothpaste tube full of shit self-filling every day. Surely enough my toilet in the morning cannot smell like a freshly brushed mouth.

Some weeks ago I started taking climbing lessons. In the meanwhile I started going everywhere with my bicycle. In the meanwhile I quit drinking. Cold-turkey. In the meanwhile I easily become skin and bones. Shitting became the most difficult things of all. There’s nothing inside meeeeee!

That’s a blog. Web page. That is a blob. Wet rage.

I am designing something that will change the world. It is not my shit though. It will be the next generation of social networks. It’ll be the social shitwork!

A long tird got out. The first bit was pretty solid. The last one was utter cream.

Bad day, bas shit. It smells greatly though. Where greatly means I could plant stuff inside my crap and it would grow a forest.

Since I had lunch with infinite pilaf rice and an improvised veggy curry, I spent the rest of the day farting. Until now, that I’m dropping the leftovers.

Wiping everything up toilet paper broke. Bad right? Why am I typing on my phone then? Wish you could see my screen now…

Ok this is weird. It feels like passion fruits are going out of me. And indeed the pool now looks like a brown cocktail. Exotic!

I can’t understand what life really is. I mean what is it a single man existence compared to the infinite life of the universe? We are nothing. We are just crap floating around, waiting to decompose, waiting to turn into someshit else. And a single shitball erupts from me.

It is time to have some changes. Perhaps I should try reverse-pooping. Or maybe not.

A waterfall of crap.

After too many hours spent between buses airports and planes with a mask on I just want to die. The only thing I wanted was to come back home and relax, but my arse called… And FINALLY I can breath! The smell of my shit, though.