I was relaxing on my sofa, just like I do every morning right after my breakfast. No noises whatsoever in the surroundings, no people stressing me out.

I was almost falling back asleep, when my belly suddenly made me wide awake with a strong and firm hit.

Fifteen minutes later I am still writhing, sitting on my toilet, tirds occasionally be spilled out of my arse, suffering the tortures of the damned.

I had to take a pause every two words. I can’t tell my story any better. I’d rather be dead in such moments.

Just like everybody else’s shits, some of mine are just dumb. Dull. Dusty. No, not dusty, just DIRTY.

Not the healthier poop ever

I was happily wiping my arse up, when I realised I made no post.

Shit! This holiday-mood is affecting even this. But I can’t forget! THE SHY TIRD DOESN’T HAVE VACATIONS!

Nice. Another Christmas passed by,

The snow is not falling outside

Under the Tree, same old stuff,

My head snowing dandruff.

My poetry smells badder than my shit.

Again. Fucking Christmas!

Another shit for this holy-day!

I wish my work will be useful for research one day.

Still, Happy Christmas!

Btw, it’s creamy and winey

Slimy.

Simple. Short.

Both the post and my shat.

A rare winter day of sun.

First beer at 10:30AM

Loads after. Many until now.

I complete my day taking a long nap shat.

After a two-hour lunch at nikkei restaurant I simply needed it.

Shit it is. Smooth and ricey

There’s an interesting factor about my shitI always forgot to report, that is to say does it float?

Yes it does, most of the times, like it does today.

I believe it depends on the quantity of fibre within.

Stay floating stay healthy!

I have a dream. I want to be recognised as the world’s most notable poop expert.

I can make it. I know that.

Have you ever forgotten something really important?

I just wiped my arse out with my bare finger. 🤫

Christmas is getting even closer and I still haven’t wrapped all my tirds up!

My precious gifts for you all!