It is time for a little turd, right before slumber

I wonder what it’d happen if my phone fell in the toilet while taking a shit…

Would some tird dedicate some nice words to me?

Probably my phone would just die.

At least today it would, I mean, it is ok to be waterproof, but it is not yet shitproof.

Hooray! Massive shat!

I am lighter then ever this morning

Ok.

Ah! Here it is! 3-inch long brown-chilli-pepperish

I am trying again to pump up my instagram account. Will it bring any benefit this time?

Sure enough it doesn’t affect my crap. She’s still inside my body. Hiding.

Apparently I still got something left to dispatch from yesterday.

Very nice.

I’m hanging on.

Am still here.

Still shitting.

Emptying.

Finally, the morning after, I am able to expel all the Bad things.

Feeling relieved, I think there might be something still hiding inside. Hideous.

Basically I spent the day eating. Hummus, artichoke lasagna, tiramisu, chocolate eggs.

…and two bottles of wine, not to he forgotten!

Now I am kind of hoping this intestine torture could end soon. The problem is that to put an end to it, I must dispose of many sticky tirds…

In the meanwhile, my bowels hurt!

My morning began with a light pain in my belly. I wake up, had breakfast.

I’m now sitting on my toilet, three long farts. My belly pain has left.

Then. Something more of matter came.

Not much else.

My arse burns, easter is on.

Everyone is happy (not true).

A huge piece of shit is stuck mid-arsehole.

This is a satisfying shat

I am terrible at writing

Follow me

I am shitting

Taking a shit

I am drunk

The tird stuck is now gone.

I feel happy (not true)

I love having this blog.

Now share me. I am a whore

Shit-whore

Happy easter from the shy tird

My arsehole was almost forgetting to wish y’all a happy easter.

I was trying to set a egg hunt, but I hid the egg too deep inside my butt.

Sadly wishing you a happy easter.

Big bomb.

Second attempt.

Single nugget.

I’m going to have another day spent doing nothing 🙄

My butt knows… and it refuses to have a shit.

I don’t wont to make no shit today