My 2nd birthday has been shit, with no shit. Slept really bad, my insomnia is breaking any record.

Tonight same thing, had no proper sleep. Obviously I was late for work and couldn’t had any shit at all. Now I feel drowsy, nauseated, and full of crap inside me.

Head start for my week. Sure thing! I wonder what shall I expect next…

Happy second birthday to me!

Let’s celebrate it with CONSTIPATION.

After a nearly 10-hour slumber, I can now proudly sit on my toilet, dropping the bomb lucidly, enjoying every single protrusion coming out of my arsehole.

PAINFULLYYYYYY!

It’s almost Halloween and all the marketing surrounding me is kind of suggesting me to celebrate it.

Perhaps I could carve a pumpkin, fill it with my own shit, and then set fire to it.

Not that scary uh? What if I produced many of them and throw one at any trick-or-treater who knocks my door?

I’ve just remembered my dream. I was at my office’s toilet, shat all over it. My boss from outside was yelling. ‘Not the right moment! Hurry up!’

I was struggling. The flush had just broke, my creamy shit was all over the poopbrush, and the toilet has no window.

I woke up

I woke up quite too early, five o’clock, the alarm was set for six. I spent the spare hour sitting on my toilet, just to incentivise my arse to produce what remains of that curry I had yesterday.

Yesterday I decided to change my website’s skin after two years. Feels like an awesome change.

Can’t say the same for my bottom. It’s seven o’clock and it doesn’t seem to care about taking a shit 🙁

All right, now a new complication begins., the more I keep shitting, the more I feel pain inside me.

Right! Exactly the boon my morning is supposed to begin with!

Feels soooo great being late at work just because my body is so troubled!

Some days I reckon I shall open a blog about insomnia. I’ve just spent one of those night in which I feel like I would not exist at all.

In the end, the very first moment after the mindstorm I find myself lucid enough to think clearly is this, while I sit on the toilet. Waiting for some shit to come out. Looks like my lack of sleep impedes my strengths though.

This post is unadventurous, uninteresting, undone. Still very much realistic of my dull life, encumbered by this fucking big problem of sleep.

Btw, I left some turds behind. All good. I can now forget the rest. If you take a shit, then nothing else matters.

My workday is finally over, I could freely go to the gym-

…Though wait a minute! I’m about to lose some weight!

T-t-t-tird down the hole!

Nice.

I had to wait at least 25 minutes before something started to shoot out.

Eventually, some cream fell inside the pool.

My work-week could now begin

I noticed I struggle having a shit in no-routine days.

It’s sunday, I woke myself up late, not had any shit. Now nothing seems to get out.

Climbing my weight down. More shit is coming! I am finally freeeeeee!

0.8 kilos of shit in less than 10 hours. Impressive!

Before this shat I was 66.6 kg, There’s clearly something evil in it!

After a long and painful shit, I am not even back to my average weight, half a kilogram of shit. This, though, is still something!

What to say?
Let’s just say I have been feeling quite wrong for days now, constipation, difficulties in farting, What’s up?!?!?!

I feel like there’s a whole cargo shit inside me! C’moooooon let’s get rid of it!

…not without pain though…