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last poops

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last   poops

When the morning comes…

by

Are you more of a night or morning person?

Definitely a morning person!

Waking up at dawn, plenty of energy, having breakfast, tidy up the house and HAVE A SHIIIIIIT!

Yeah, my arsehole routine is now set!

Tuesday, 5 December 2023 | 08:54 AM

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Nice and easy shit in the morning. Everything perfect.

But one thing.

I keep forgetting toilet paper on the basin shelf, and I have to squat leg-open, crab-like, to the shelf, to grab the paper without spreading my dung on my cheeks.

Disgusting ain’t it? Just picture it!

Saturday, 2 December 2023 | 06:57 AM

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It’s Saturday morning, and I just wanted to keep sleeping…

Where am I instead? For those who follow me, it’s easy, I am on the toilet….

Taking a shit in the early morning is something mystical. I don’t know how many times I faced this situation, my arsehole spread, the dawn right outside my window, and my cat watching the whole frame.

Yeah, mystical…

At least my crap is smooth and easy…

Thursday, 30 November 2023 | 08:30 AM

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I am eating fruits, veggies, fibre, carbo, proteins, everything for a balanced diet, still, I have these moments of dull, no shit at all. Can’t stand it!!!

Yeah, indeed, I shall stay sit the whole day on my toilet

Tuesday, 28 November 2023 | 07:57 AM

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It’s getting difficult to grow back a streak.

With this blog of mine, I probably reached an over 200-day streak, until I broke it. Shit, I love streaks, my streak on Duolingo is 1294 days.

But I can’t keep up with my shit streak, there’s always something getting in between, that makes me forget to renew my daily pledge: to take a shit reporting it. Sometimes it’s just constipation, some other times it is my stressful life, which also triggers constipation…

Anyway, let’s try to do this one more time. I take a shit and Immediately report it. Yeah, I can do it!

I must say, It’s easier on days such as this when my urge to shit pushes me further, I have to expel my girlfriend from the bathroom because I can’t survive longer…

Saturday, 25 November 2023 | 07:07 AM

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This week has been harsh, been working for way too much time. Indeed, I am working all day also today.

All right, who cares?

Nobody but my bowels, which are cross, so angry they don’t allow me to take a freaking shit.

C’mon! I just need some shiiit!