Thursday, 19 December 2019 |12:41 AM

Ever since I started this whole shitty thing I gave me just one rule: publish a post every time I take a poo. I think it is clear.

Besides that I can’t publish posts if I don’t take a poo. It is a stupid rule, I know

I am a bit sick, so I have been eating just veggies soups for couple of days. This diet resulted in having nothing to shit whatsoever, not a single drop.

Here’s how I lost my 55-day streak. I am so sad.

Anyway, since I just shat what I did not in the past few days I broke my length record!!

I haven’t developed a consistent way of measurement yet, but I am sure this huge log was 5-inche long at least!

That was painful!

Tuesday, 17 December 2019 | 01:16 PM

Lunch time sessions are my favourite ones.

My body is fully aware of what’s going on, my mind as well. My nose is not so lucky though.

Tuesday, 17 December 2019 | 10:25 AM

Despite my name, this shat is pretty pushy. It just wanted to come out, kept sending dire warnings since I opened my eyes in the morning.

Monday, 16 December 2019 | 07:39 AM

Induced reprise!

I can’t leave bringing such a burden all day long.

And Yes. It smells like this one’s the best idea of the day. Better lock this scent in my loo.

Monday, 16 December 2019 | 06:54 AM

Fuck me!

Fuck me! I need to sleep, body!

Yesterday I had one of the best dinner ever. A friend of mine is a fisherman, so he and his girlfriend basically take some fish every weekend, they eat all the big ones right away, saving the little ones for a grater future.

This great future came yesterday, and was delicious! Fish had this precious rich flavour one could not tell in words, you should have taste it!

Everything was perfect, though I cannot eat that much in the evening, I simply can’t afford it! Even if everything was totally free my belly just couldn’t bear everything.

Therefore I slept just 4 hours, and my stomach is still pretty full.

I hate this.

Sunday, 15 December 2019 | 04:28 PM

Oh boy! Eventually I free myself!

Yesterday I went to a night party, it was so long since I attended one. I came back late in the morning.

Guess my body just forgot what time it was because of that!

Saturday, 14 December 2019 | 07:12 PM

You know I don’t like defining my diet in tags. I am not a vegetarian, I am not a carnivore either. Obviously I am not vegan. I like everything. I care about planet sustainability, yet I eat at fast foods (like one a year). My diet is healthy, varied, too salty some days, too much alcohol some other times.

I just eat what I feel like eating.

Today I had lunch with a mixed grill composed by every meat types. That was simply great.

And now let’s just clear my bowels out!

Saturday, 14 December 2019 | 10:27 AM

Great morning today!

Yet I just disposed of three little children.

Saturday, 14 December 2019 | 01:06 AM

Just a few crumbles before rest.

Friday, 13 December 2019 | 08:47 AM

And here comes the reprise!!

Oh boy! You know haruspex? In Ancient Rome they used to practice divination, they were able to read omens typically from dead animal corpses. Nowadays some cultures (Turkey, Greece) reads future (or pretend to do so) from empty coffee cups.

Well, I just saw the letters C I C written in cripple thin tirds. What would that mean?

I just know it smells right like a dead body in here!

Cfr. Haruspex wiki

Friday, 13 December 2019 | 07:22 AM

Thank god it’s Friday! And I ate pizza yesterday!

This means just one thing: TIRD-XPLOSION!

I kinda scent there will be many during the day!

Thursday, 12 December 2019 | 06:31 PM

You know, there are some moments in which I am just having my wee… then SHIT HAPPENS!

Everybody knows that.

But my arse knows it better!

Thursday, 12 December 2019 | 08:49 AM

Sizes matter. Especially when you got a huge tirdpedo coming out from your arse, defying elasticity of my skin.

Wednesday, 11 December 2019 | 09:05 AM

Rain shit!

Tuesday, 10 December 2019 | 7:50 AM

The discomfort I feel in my life comes from many factors. One of them is my fragile belly, that is for sure!

Maybe I just shouldn’t have ate those chickpeas for dinner, maybe I shouldn’t have drank half a bottle of red wine. Maybe I should just stop lamenting.

In such a way I start my day.

Well, only after I freed the monster inside me!