Saturday, 25 January 2020 | 12:56 PM

There was something amazing I was going to write today!
But I forgot.

Friday, 24 January 2020 | 11:19 PM

Finally home. Warm, cozy toilet and a sweet sour scent.

Friday, 24 January 2020 | 08:39 PM

Fuck! I’m at the beach with my fisherman friend. It’s shitty windy and I desperately need a shit!

Harsh.

Friday, 24 January 2020 | 09:53 AM

The explosive beans effect:

When you are constantly on a budget, especially at the end of the week, you’ve got to face the fact you got nothing left in the fridge. You open the cupboard, nothing apart from some opened rice boxes and a can of kidney beans. Wait a minute it can’t be! Let me open the fridge again! I knew that! There’s an onion left… well actually it is just a small piece of an onion. It’ll go! It must.

So you boil your rice, drain your beans, cut the onion and put it all together. It taste nice. It must.

Then you go to bed, you still feel your stomach going sour whilst beans inflate your belly.

You get up, feeling very relaxed, kinda floating in mid-air, then you dive for your loo, you sit on the toilet and you make a fart last 5 seconds. You’re satisfied.

You go have breakfast, you still feel drowsy, then you go have a shower.

Now that I’m in the toilet I’ll just sit for a moment on my throne…

…AND HERE IT COMES! Explosion from your insides!

BBEEAANNSS EEFFEECCTT STROKE AGAIN!

Thursday, 23 January 2020 | 06:27 PM

What if an elephant enters in a room and nobody’s there?

Is that particular fat elephant really inside that room?

Can anybody tell if that very fat elephant is real?

No, my poop smells.

Thursday, 23 January 2020 | 12:35 PM

Shat at the shopping mall achieved.

Wednesday, 22 January 2020 | 08:37 PM

Have you ever tried pooping with al the lights turned off, intentionally?

Don’t do it. It’s dumb.

Wednesday, 22 January 2020 | 04:17 PM

That was close!
Something peeked out.

Wednesday, 22 January 2020 | 01:31 PM

There are days like this: me working on my laptop from closet.

Tuesday, 21 January 2020 | 10:50 PM

It’s been more than three months now since I started to dedicate more time and thoughts to my shats.

You know, I really love my introspective poops now; I’ve always had some, that’s for sure, though now these moments are even better.

Cheers to contemplative shats!

Now. Please arse, make me finish this one. I’ve got stuff to do!

Tuesday, 22 January 2020 | 09:31 AM

Let’s just begin this lacky-sleep day with a few pops!

Tuesday, 21 January 2020 | 01:43 AM

I just realised an entire day just passed without me taking a shit.

I am still working non stop since when I woke up this morning.

It’s so weird the way stress affects my body. I just farted all day long.

Sunday, 19 January 2020 | 10:16 PM

Thank god it’s sunday! The very end of the week, the beginning of a new one.

Let’s see, what did I accomplish in the last seven days?

Well, for sure I discovered the best accompaniment for my loo sessions: relaxed shat music.

Sunday, 19 January 2020 | 02:14 AM

According to Worldometer 7,8 millions people are currently living on our planet earth.

We, as a single species, poop every day. Healthline even conducted an interesting survey about it. According to their article we can assume an average shat weights around 1/2 pound.

Now. Let’s say every one of us poops once a day. It would mean we, as humans, produce 3.9 millions pounds of crap every single day. It’s about 1.7 thousand of tons a day!

It’s insane! It’s so much waste! If only we could sell it we’d all be rich!

Actually, who’s going to buy it, anyway?

I can’t stop thinking about my girlfriend. This long-distant relationship it’s harsh, but I love her so much!

It may sound degrading, thinking about my girl while I’m pooping, but it is not.

After all she saw me sitting on her toilet right the very first day we dated.

What is this, if it’s not love?