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last   poops

Friday, 17 January 2020 | 07:25 AM

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Friday, 17 January 2020 | 07:25 AM

Such a lovely intestine I have! I spent the night collecting farts while sleeping.

I can’t say I slept badly, I just woke up a bit earlier than I expected!

On the other hand I lived the most adventurous dream ever: at first I went in Copenaghen for the official roll-out of one of my best friends’ roller coaster. It was more like a huge wheel (350 feet high) onto we orbited so stupidly fast I lost control and smashed pretty far away from it.

I ended up in a place such far I can’t say it was in Denmark anymore. I just know I was at another friend of mine’s place. In the real world money is not a problem for him at all all right? But in this spectacular dream he bought a new Audi prototype kinda resembling a rollercoaster-spacecraft-launching-vessel – you know, the kind of stuff Elon Musk invests 4 million dollars on. I was inside it with a few other friends, at launch I was excited – I like speedy things! – though I startled as soon as we departed. It was out of control!

Needless to say I ended up in a new Sci-Fi scenario (I’m really considering a career into Cinema – my brain appears to be good at non-sense scripts): this time I was with scientists on a platform built under the sea, we were testing odd swimming suits that looked like spacesuits, and the head of the operation was my former professor at University. I can’t really recall how the dream ended, but I’m quite sure the suit stopped working right after we dived.

Even if I died tonight, and I am now concerned about my roller-coaster drift, the dream was terrific!

By the way, all this time I was telling my tales I am still pooping. Just saying

Wednesday, 15 January 2020 | 08:36 AM

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Wednesday, 15 January 2020 | 08:36 AM

Yesterday I came home so late I had no time opening a parcel I received.

Opening parcels is one of the most exciting, mysterious and fun activity a man of the present – such as we all are – could experience.

I thought it was my Amazon order – stupid lithium rechargeable batteries! I am such a slave to technology! – instead it just was my stickers supposed to arrive only at the end of the month!

Now, I love stickers. Especially when there’s my tird pictured onto them.

Tuesday, 14 January 2020 | 10:05 PM

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Tuesday, 14 January 2020 | 10:05 PM

Fuck! Sometimes it’s pretty tricky writing new posts. I gotta invent something new every time.

It’s tough. Especially when you can’t live without having a shat three times a day!

Tuesday, 14 January 2020 | 05:16 PM

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Tuesday, 14 January 2020 | 05:16 PM

Remember, if you make it at a friend’s loo just be kind and place some paper on the closet’s slope. If you’re lucky you won’t even get to clean!

If you’re unlucky, well, if there’s no toilet paper, praise the lord.

Monday, 13 January 2020 | 10:31 PM

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Tuesday, 13 January 2020 | 10:31 PM

Today I started running again.

It’s such a pain in the neck when you’re into it, just giving your best but you feel The burden inside you- and it just wants to get out.

Monday, 13 January 2020 | 08:37 AM

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Monday, 13 January 2020 | 08:37 AM

It is pretty difficult waking up on Mondays, but that’s something everybody knows…

I’ll tell you something nobody knows: constipation is what makes a Monday unpleasant!

But in the end, it doesn’t even matter: it gets out on its shyness.

Sunday, 12 January 2020 | 06:41 PM

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Sunday, 12 January 2020 | 06:41 PM

Sheeeet! I’ve been waiting for this all day!

After a super hot dog at lunch and an all you can eat sushi at dinner yesterday, today I felt like double gravity was on me!

How odd! Now I float in mid-air like a hot-air balloon