Thursday, 30 January 2020 | 04:45 PM

A new eating place recently opened in my town. They make chinese specialties.

It’s been two months now I’m looking forward to eating there.
Well thinking about China situation nowadays, I reckon haven’t picked the right moment for eating there.

Now I’m locked in the bathroom, hoping that ramen won’t give me much more trouble apart from this shit.

Thursday, 30 January 2020 | 08:30 AM

I’m sitting here and I wonder if taking a poop depends on experience or it’s just instinct.

I mean are elder people more expert in taking a shit as they are more expert in life, having lived life longer than youngsters?

My arse is still a bit sleepy so I’m constipated. Even though I’m weighted by nutrients from yesterday – and I feel it – they all can’t get out.

Would an older version of me, a future-shy-tird, be able to make it anyway? Will I be so saturated with experience in order to do some tricks and shit anyways?

Wednesday, 29 January 2020 | 11:07 AM

There has been an unexpected expulsion of fecal matter.

Wednesday, 29 January 2020 | 10:10 AM

Today’s product is worth taking about.

It’s odd. Normal color. It felt like a golf ball outrushing from the hole, but now that I can see it, it is just a few small pieces.

Tuesday, 28 January 2020 | 09:08 PM

Another one for the not important shats

Tuesday, 28 January 2020 | 09:29 AM

Fun Fact.

We as human species are animals. In details we are a singularly evoluted mammal called Homo Sapiens. Cool ah?
Most of the scientists agree on the fact we descend from monkeys, everybody knows that!
To be more precise we descend from the same ancient animal species – which is now extinct – monkeys and apes descend from.

We are very similar! Even if one’s not a scientist can tell that. They walk on two legs, they live in communities, they have sex the very same way we do it – even between two individuals of the same gender, see bonobos -, they take a shit every once in a while.

Right. Awesome!
How come then we’re the only animal sitting on a toilet?
This makes me feel stupid.

Monday, 27 January 2020 | 06:44 PM

Very fast reprise.

Monday, 27 January 2020 | 06:36 PM

I’ll go running in a minute. It is vital to get rid of the burden.

Now I can sprint.

Monday, 20 January 2020 | 11:09 AM

I think shitposting is The Modern Thing.

And I am so proud being part of it!

Sunday, 26 January 2020 | 11:44 PM

Today’s been great. I basically went tripping with a friend of mine to visit a building wreck. It used to be a residence by the sea, everything was tearing apart apart from the building skeleton itself. Cement made. Pretty strong.

We skipped lunch. And I emitted about twenty-four loud farts. That was amusing.

Sunday, 26 January 2020 | 09:40 AM

Sun is up in the sky, birds fly high, not even a breath of wind.

Such a great day to have a trip shit!

Saturday, 25 January 2020 | 12:56 PM

There was something amazing I was going to write today!
But I forgot.

Friday, 24 January 2020 | 11:19 PM

Finally home. Warm, cozy toilet and a sweet sour scent.

Friday, 24 January 2020 | 08:39 PM

Fuck! I’m at the beach with my fisherman friend. It’s shitty windy and I desperately need a shit!

Harsh.

Friday, 24 January 2020 | 09:53 AM

The explosive beans effect:

When you are constantly on a budget, especially at the end of the week, you’ve got to face the fact you got nothing left in the fridge. You open the cupboard, nothing apart from some opened rice boxes and a can of kidney beans. Wait a minute it can’t be! Let me open the fridge again! I knew that! There’s an onion left… well actually it is just a small piece of an onion. It’ll go! It must.

So you boil your rice, drain your beans, cut the onion and put it all together. It taste nice. It must.

Then you go to bed, you still feel your stomach going sour whilst beans inflate your belly.

You get up, feeling very relaxed, kinda floating in mid-air, then you dive for your loo, you sit on the toilet and you make a fart last 5 seconds. You’re satisfied.

You go have breakfast, you still feel drowsy, then you go have a shower.

Now that I’m in the toilet I’ll just sit for a moment on my throne…

…AND HERE IT COMES! Explosion from your insides!

BBEEAANNSS EEFFEECCTT STROKE AGAIN!