My average week-day starts like this, I wake up before my alarm, needy of more sleep, I have my breakfast, then I lay on the sofa doing some duolingo. I fall back asleep, but I wake up again by the urge for some serious shit.

I go sitting on my desk to start my marvellous day…

…still thinking about those turds I just released, missing ‘em already

Almost forgetting!

I just need to shortly summarise my shit experience from yesterday.

Woke up at 10:30AM, have some sorta brunch at 12:00PM, took a huge seamless crap at my friend’s house, went climbing outdoor, freezing my arse off, felt the urge for shit, had to keep it inside, store it to save it for the bad weather you know…

Well, had some beers and gin-drinks for dinner (that was my dinner), and went to sleep.

I’ve been sitting on my toilet for twenty minutes now. It’s aggressive!

Let me give you a suggestion: NEVER NEGLECT YOUR CRAP. It’ll get back at you! Stabbing you in the back arse.

One single shot. One is enough

I just feel it. I need it.

Sorry friend, I left some crap in your toilet

Taking a shit while my gf whatches me becomes easier and easier every day.

Conference from the loo pt.2

I had an asparagus omelet for lunch, now the only thing I could smell is asparagus.

Tremendous! Today I am watching the very first live conference from my white throne.

Sometimes I just love COVID, it certainly has its perks.

Now, this is worth a post. Just joking. It sticks my cheeks together.

Nothing great about my crap today. Dullest dull

Constipation.

I never suffered from hemorrhoids, so I don’t know what it feels like. Yet, the only thing I know is, it starts with a bit of a pain while sitting…

Indeed. Yesterday I felt it. I don’t know what it is yet, but it sounds like an injury to me. This kind of job I carry on has its risks…

Well, I’ll just keep posting and shitting and posting and shitting. It hurts a bit, but that’s still the mist wonderful job I’ve ever had!

A new week begins. What’s going to happen?

Will I be able not to drink any alchool?

These questions are very related to my stinky crap laying in the toilet pool.

Well, let’s see… My anus is ready!

Yesterday was a delightful day for climbing!

So I went out early in the morning… but I could go further than 400 meters because I had to come back home, I forgot something.

What I forgot was I drank 2 litres of beer the day before, so I had another diarrhoea attack.

It’s a pity though, I though I would have wrote a post shitting on some rocks, but luckily enough, it hasn’t happened…

Yesterday I had something like five pints of beer. Now I’d like to be rewarded five points to gryffindor because of the great magic that just got out of my body.

I mean, it’s effect can’t be caused by anything apart from a great spell of magic! It hurts, it’s stingy, it’s broad!

…and it’s lasting too long.

Fuck me and fuck beer.

My girlfriend told me funny stories about her shit. I think she’s going to join me on this blog, as an occasiona co-author.

Nobody cares, and my arse is booming. The air gaping my tirds is more compressed than soft air guns