I’m so tired I can’t tell if I am alive or dead.

Shit suddenly reminds me I am alive. Spikey

Today my anus is sparkly, it makes bum bum humming sound, very very amusing. There’s no poop though 🙁

Rubbles

Downloading…

Shitment postponed. Am late

My vacations are through. I’m back at the studio…

What’s the first thing I do as soon my boss gets out? I TAKE A SHIIIIIIT! yeeeaaaahhhh!!!

Creamy shiiiiiit!!

Seems like my arse missed home more than I did.

Am still shitting here…🙄

I’ve just come back from a 13-day road-camping trip. I am simply EXHAUSTED.

First things first. TAKING A HUGE CRAPPY SHIT. I’ve spent the last three days of my trip sustaining solely on canned beans. Basically I was a walking fart. I was Loud. I was free.

This morning I went to the very same spot I took a shit yesterday. That old thing was totally black, plenty of ants and flies.

Then I piled a ninja turd on top of that. They won’t be lonely anymore!

Ain’t no shit to do in the water.

I did it crouched behind a bush, with the sound of the water pleasing me

A single fly kisses my products.

Five friends on a pretty lonely bay, far from everything.

Couldn’t find the toilet paper, PANIC.

BACK ON SHITTING IN THE WATEEER!

You understand you became an animal when flies come eating on your anus as soon as the tird detaches

Today something pretty unique happened. We were looking for a beach by the river, but the road was too messy for my SW. As we stop, my girlfriend had to take a shit, she was holding it for too many days – constipation, such a plague.

She wanted me to stay away. ‘Now I know how dogs feel like when somebody stares at them while they poop!’, she said. I kept the distance, but as soon as she finished I went where she did her thing, and I couldn’t help but see what laid there. It was FUCKING ENORMOUS.

I can say I am pretty expert on faecal matter, nevertheless I was astonished. HOW THE HELL DID IT GET OUT?’!’ I shouted.

‘You don’t know my perks yet’, she started proudly

Some twenty minutes ago I performed the longest, the strongest, the hardest, the biggest shit outdoor.

Yesterday some locals offered us infinite beer, infinite grilled meat, infinite wine, infinite good company. Resulting in infinite pile of shit under the tree, over some dead foliage.

The most satisfying thing though was the swarm of flies tasting my freshly shat poop.

Nat Geo LIVE.

Still, inside the tent, I think my girlfriend lying next to me could be dead. I farted rancid farts for the whole night.

Even I could be death by now.

Probably I am writing from heaven