Yesterday I had Indian food for dinner. I thought my arsehole would have taken it worse than it is now, but ok! Good for me!

It doesn’t even smell! NIIIICE

Squeezed entirely in 1.34seconds

G: I took a crap at the office for the first time today

G: moments of panic. The turd wouldn’t flush down.

L: Performance Anxiety?

G: Nope

G: The flush couldn’t dump it

L: How did you get away with it?

G: I pushed the turd down with the toilet brush

G: Helped by the water

L: base strategy, very nice

L: I was expecting more creative stuff

G: Just for one second I thought about taking the turd barehanded and trash it in the bin

Apparently I was a little constipated previously. There was more shit to come.

Here I am, deploying it

Ok, enough holding it, stop pretending you don’t need to have a shit. You do! Stop ignoring me!!!

Couldn’t resist to those lovely words my bowels said

Still holding my shit inside

Some shit was apparently hidden inside me.

I was feeling it coming one fart at the time. They got shorter and stinkier, then

SOLID

A huge Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster just took the spotlight in my bathroom. It crowds the pool with such a cockiness, that any other turd is now afraid to get out.

I feel fine though, it was worth three meals

A loooooooooong fart and the day begins

I am almost getting back to my routine. I just need to have a shit before eight though.

My arse is a little cross at this time of the day, need it more relaxed!

Turds are dry prunes now

Mu turds just sank. Byebye

Some babies.

Brownies

I was actually waiting for this moment today.

Since I took a shit late in the early morning, before going to bed, then nothing after I woke up.

Well, it came then! And it was wonderful! 2 heavy stones out!

Two little turds, nice to be there at this time of the day. I think I can go to sleep now.

Just woken up by my bowels.

‘Hey mate! There’s a parcel to be delivered!’

Here’s where I am now, at the post office, long queue…

Lol, nope! There’s no such thing as long queues here! I’m in the toilet, and there’s a queue of shit piling up behind me