Just as people count sheep before sleeping, I count turds getting out of my arse.

Today they were eleven!

Today me and my girlfriend are on a one-day vacation.

Cool!

Just woke up. First thing? SHIT.

Whoa

Even my bowels love vacation!

Wonderful shit this morning

9/10

Horrible smell. My cats love it. I hate it. It’s horrible.

Bad reeky shit

Am having some trouble taking a shit this morning.

Oh wait. Here it is!

A SHY TIRD

Some shit (even a few turds) is better than nothing…

This morning it’s like this. Not utter satisfaction, yet something!

Only a little turd because I has pizza yesterday

I hate it when I’m late and I found myself still on the toilet when people start calling me from work

I just had to wait until my stomach was full and could push on my bowels.

So, second shit of the day comes

Tbh I thought I would have taken another shit this morning. That’s why the first one two hours ago wasn’t worth telling anybody