Monday, 13 January 2020 | 08:37 AM

It is pretty difficult waking up on Mondays, but that’s something everybody knows…

I’ll tell you something nobody knows: constipation is what makes a Monday unpleasant!

But in the end, it doesn’t even matter: it gets out on its shyness.

Sunday, 12 January 2020 | 06:41 PM

Sheeeet! I’ve been waiting for this all day!

After a super hot dog at lunch and an all you can eat sushi at dinner yesterday, today I felt like double gravity was on me!

How odd! Now I float in mid-air like a hot-air balloon

Sunday, 12 January 2020 | 03:18 AM

I hate it when I just want to go to sleep, but I desperately need a shit.

In the meanwhile my slimy tirds start to sing Michael Jackson’s Bad.

Saturday, 11 January 2020 | 06:39 PM

Is humankind real? or are we just our own self-imagination?

crap.

Saturday, 11 January 2020 | 11:57 AM

Caco, ergo sum

I simply think thoughts are more powerful when shitting.
I reckon even Descartes used to produce his genius thoughts during his defecations.

Friday, 10 January 2020| 11:12 PM

Well I emptied an entire bottle of red wine all by myself.

I just arsecrafted an awl made of shit.

It hurts.

Still, I feel fulfilled in my hearth: I am happy.

Friday, 10 January 2020 | 10:42 AM

Sprinkled reprise.

Friday, 10 January 2020 | 10:23 AM

I feel lankier.

Friday, 10 January 2020 | 12:20 AM

I’d better clear the pipes, otherwise it would jeopardise my sleep, and I’m pretty sick of it!

Ow, such a soothing sound.

Thursday, 9 January 2020 | 08:40 AM

Bombs Away!

Better shout it before shitting than at war.