Thursday, 20 April 2023 | 03:54 AM

My condition is pretty clear, though so difficult to describe…

I am awake, in the middle of the night. That is a fact, this is the clear part. I don’r feel good, this is the resume of what is so difficult to describe.

Let’s start from the end, I am using my girlfriend’s toilet bin to keep my legs a little raised from the floor. In the last few days, I bought a Squatty Potty to try it, and to review it, because I was sceptical about it. She told me she’s always wanted it, instead, she’s been using her bin to keep her legs lifted. She assured me ‘It works!!’

After a few trials at home I haven’t really found it useful, but today I really would have fancied it. I am at hers, no Squatty Potty here, and I can’t sleep. I ate a lot for dinner, we went to a Nikkei restaurant I like a lot and I couldn’t help eating a lot. The problem is, I’ve been having problems with my bowels for days now, and I really shouldn’t have eaten much, I should have rested, been careful, and everything.

But now it is too late to be regretful. I feel bad, I am still burping dinner, I can’t sleep, and my head aches… but let’s focus on the silver linings here! I feel a little relieved by my raised-legs squat position, I feel like those little turds could get out more easily, I guess this will be part of my squatty potty story. But we will see. Truth is I feel it missing.

Published by theshytird

I am a timid piece of crap

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