My arse still hurts.
Let me just tell you the whole story, I went climbing early in the morning. I though I liberated myself from all the crap inside me in the morning, but I was wrong. As soon as I approached my first route I felt the burden inside me, idling, waiting for me to expel it.
My outdooring went on until the sun set, then I headed back to the city centre where I’m going to meet a friend. During the return trip I programmed to take a shit at the bar I am meeting her, then the urge became more urgent. I simply neeeeeeded a shit.
I park in an isolated, unlit, place. I take the cleaning paper I prudently store in my car, I run to the perfect spot. My back on a tree. I push my pants down. Abruptly, everything gets out immediately, no struggle needed. In the moment I even pee on my trousers. I wipe my arse. My hands clumsily catch some dirt. No prob, I clean my fingers with another spare tissue.
Well. Now I can meet my friend. Stinky, dusty, shitty. Empty.